Negative Emotions – How to Release Them and Set Ourselves Free
Negative emotions – fear, worries, depression, shame, guilt, panic – the list is endless. We have experienced them all and know very well the unpleasant, painful feeling they cause.
Emotions, whether negative or positive, are an important part of us. Some define our emotions as messengers, means of communication from our souls, nudges from the angels. Whatever you think they are, you are right.
As important our emotions are, they come with their energy. When we experience an emotion, a ball of energy rushes through our body. If we process the emotion, the energy is transformed and/or released. All is good, we feel light. This is more often the case when we experience positive emotions such as peace, joy, happiness, love, excitement.
When we feel negative emotions, however, they are often heavy, dense and even painful. No wonder, we prefer to push them aside, bury them or try to escape. Escape you may try, but until the emotion is processed and release, it stay in our body as extra heavy, dense energy. It feels like a ball, a stone stuck inside us.
Take a few moments and tune into your body. Do you feel a ball in your stomach? Or a rock on your chest? Or a lump stuck in your throat? These are all energy blocks accumulated overtime through all unprocessed emotions. The more you accumulate these, the bigger they grow until they are so big and heavy that start causing health issues.
So, what can we do?
In this article, I share a simple method I use for releasing stuck emotions. I have read many books, tried many techniques and came up with a compilation that works for me. Don’t be afraid to experiment and see what works for you.
How to Release Negative Emotions
Step 1: Identify the negative emotion
When I feel down (physically or emotionally), I know there are some unprocessed emotions waiting to be released. Other symptoms include feeling hungry, restless, or depressed, wanting to do something but not knowing what. Or, when I can’t get my thoughts together, feel scattered, irritated, iffy. Or, my “favourite” – when I cannot take a deep breath. All of these are my clue that it’s time to stop and do some clean up.
The first step is to take a few moments to identify what really bothers me. It could be one thing or a bundle of many.
Here is my most recent example: after having a super stressful week at work, I noticed that my breathing is shallow. I tried and tried to breath deeply but nothing worked. My stomach would occasionally feel like a ball, but mostly my breathing was troubled. No need to suffer longer, I started thinking what was the key cause for my discomfort. Well, I felt overwhelmed from the amount of work I had to do. In addition, I was overstressed from the problems I encountered. Finally, I feared that I wouldn’t be able to do my work on time and thus, cause problems for myself, my team and my boss.
The week passed. I managed to do all my work, dealt with all problems without getting into troubles. But, because I did not take the time to process the emotions, they got stuck inside me.
Now that I have identified them, I was ready for step 2.
Step 2: Locate the emotion
Where in your body, do you feel discomfort? Is it in your throat? Or, your feet? Or, your stomach? Take a few moments to be clear where and how do you feel the excess energy.
For example, in my case, I felt as if an iron block was on top of my chest and I couldn’t breathe. Literary, there was a block of excess energy hanging over my chest area.
Please note that although you identify and locate the emotion in your body, this doesn’t remove it from there.
Step 3: Move the energy to the surface of your palms
Take as long as you need to mentally move the energy from your body to the palms of your hand. To do so, cup your hands in front of you and start imagining how the energy moves there. It may take a minute, 5 minutes, 20 minutes. Don’t give up.
If the stuck energy is very old, too heavy and dense, it will take longer time to be moved. If the energy is from a recent unprocessed emotion, it will take shorter time to be moved. I find it helpful to rest my cupped hands on my lap.
How do I know the energy is moved?
In the beginning, I noticed that the sensation in my body disappears quickly but then it comes back. I was focusing only on the initial place (i.e., my throat, or my stomach). What I was missing, however, was the sensation on my palms.
With time, I learned that the energy is moved when I start feeling “hot stones” on my palms. For me, when the energy from the unprocessed emotion is moved, my hands feel as holding something hot and heavy. That’s when I know, I’m ready to release it.
For you, it may feel as if you are holding something heavy, or ice cubes, or hot stones. Everyone is different, so focus and notice what is the sensation for you.
Step 4: Give thanks to the experience
Before the final step, take a moment to give thanks to the experience. It may sound odd since this is something negative and painful; but, remember that everything happens for you. Every experience comes with gifts. If you can identify them, great. Thank the experience and the emotions for these. If you cannot see the gifts immediately, then, thank the emotions for being so persistent that you finally noticed them and decided to release them.
Make it personal, make it tangible. You are changing, growing, expanding, and these experiences and emotions are an important part of the process. Although the feeling is unpleasant and the label is “negative,” you don’t have to judge it as such. Negative experiences and emotions increase our awareness, point their finger to our old and limiting beliefs. Acknowledge this and be grateful for the gifts and the opportunity to release them.
In my case, I thanked my unprocessed emotions for reminding me of the ways I gave my power away. Instead of staying grounded and believing in my power and ability to deal with the situations, I started “running around” and lost myself. This was not to judge or condemn myself but to remind myself that there is always a better way. I am learning and expanding and am grateful for the opportunity to practice.
This process shift my entire perspective. Instead of seeing everything from the point of view of the victim, I felt as a hero-in-the-making. I didn’t need to feel bad about myself anymore. It’s like perfecting a song I learn how to play on the piano. I know it’ll take some practice till I play it the way I like. Same with handling my work load while staying centered and grounded. It takes time to learn new habits.
Step 5: Blow the energy away
And now, you are ready to release whatever doesn’t serve you.
Take a deep breath in and on the exhale, blow away the hot stones (or whatever you feel holding). Imagine how the stones transform into flowers and butterflies. Imagine how the pain, density and heaviness become beauty, light and love. Keep blowing until your palms feel light, until you feel light. It might take a blow or two, it might take 5 or 10.
After this exercise, I felt so good, so peaceful, so light. Now, I can look at the past week from a distance and with objectivity. This exercise did not erase or changed the past, however, I am not triggered by the memory any more. I can breathe deeply and feel peaceful.
Give it a try
If there are more than one bodily sensation or negative emotion you want to release, simply repeat the process. The more you do it, the quicker you’ll release them.
And one final note: never blow the energy against a mirror as it’ll bounced back at you. Blow it into the open space where it’s free to dissolve.
Only you can set yourself free from the chains of the unprocessed negative emotions. It’s easier than you think 🙂
